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May. 7th, 2005 06:02 pmWell, tomorrow is Mother's Day. Most moms love Mother's Day, but I don't. Don't get me wrong, I love being a mom. Ask anyone that knows me and they'll tell you how much I love Piper. How wonderful my life is since I've had her. But Mother's Day just isn't my day. It's supposed to be a day of flowers and hugs and kisses... breakfast in bed, after the kid leaves the kitchen a mess because they can't quite reach something they needed in the cabinets. A day for smiles and good memories.
My memories of my Mother's Days of the past (with Piper) are alright, and that's the best they will be. Piper has some special surprise ready for me in the morning (she's been in her room all day with the door shut, a signon it telling me to stay out. She seems to be feeling better) but it will still be overshadowed by memories of my first Mother's Day.
My first Mother's Day was the day I leanred I could truly HATE another human. And I hate him to this day. I found out that my then-husband cheated on me on my first mother's day... And went home that night, and argued about it. And he didn't like what I had to say, so he proceeded to beat me bad enough to send me to a hospital that night. I left him the next day and took my daughter with me. And I divorced the bastard three months later.
I'll never forgive him for making THAT my memory of my first Mother's Day. Perhpas I'm bitter, but I feel like I deserve to be. He's gone on with his life, with a new family, while I raise a child that sometimes reminds me of the man I hate in when she glances at me sideways, or frowns at me when I tell her no.
Bitter? Sometimes. Mad at him? Sometimes, but not really. But I'll never forgive him for the past.
My memories of my Mother's Days of the past (with Piper) are alright, and that's the best they will be. Piper has some special surprise ready for me in the morning (she's been in her room all day with the door shut, a signon it telling me to stay out. She seems to be feeling better) but it will still be overshadowed by memories of my first Mother's Day.
My first Mother's Day was the day I leanred I could truly HATE another human. And I hate him to this day. I found out that my then-husband cheated on me on my first mother's day... And went home that night, and argued about it. And he didn't like what I had to say, so he proceeded to beat me bad enough to send me to a hospital that night. I left him the next day and took my daughter with me. And I divorced the bastard three months later.
I'll never forgive him for making THAT my memory of my first Mother's Day. Perhpas I'm bitter, but I feel like I deserve to be. He's gone on with his life, with a new family, while I raise a child that sometimes reminds me of the man I hate in when she glances at me sideways, or frowns at me when I tell her no.
Bitter? Sometimes. Mad at him? Sometimes, but not really. But I'll never forgive him for the past.
